I want for nothing..............except some highly priced items.

I think it’s pretty well known fact that even though running in theory is free, it can actually be so expensive that I want to dig my eyes out with a spork once I add up all the costs depleting my paltry bank account. I really do try and keep my running expenses down – I only purchased a $4 lunch bag at my last race expo, I completely bypassed the $100 pain relief electro-ipod thingy that my dad fell victim to buying (sucka!). My running drawer has a minimal – yet utterly fashionable – array of choices, and I only recently replaced my bikilas after I discovered that they are not in fact, machine washable. They should tell you that kind of stuff on the label--- oh wait, something is coming back to me……they did mention that….in bold print.

My financial pitfalls have been races and the atrocious associated fees of gas, lodging, and entry fees. Here’s a bit of advice I wish someone had given me eight months ago: there is no benefit whatsoever in selecting the host hotel as my choice of lodging and it will cost me approximately a crap load more to stay there than the reasonably priced hotel down the street. Not only will it cost me more of my precious dinero to stay there, but in some cases the host hotel isn’t even near the start OR EFFING FINISH of the race (Shamrock Marathon, I’m looking at you). As a newbie runner I think I learned my lesson; have my husband make the reservations with his card, then forget where my credit card is during check out. *

As much as I try to be reasonable with my finances, there’s still some basic material necessities in running that would make my world a lot happier. As I list these items, keep in mind that there’s no need to look up the definition of the word necessity.

1. Garmin 405 – why? Because I’m frankly tired of wearing a computer on my wrist, otherwise known as the Garmin 305. I feel very outdated with this piece of plastic - I've run through Amish country roads and I know I heard chuckling from someone churning butter.

2. Nike Women's Cyclone Jacket - this jacket is so cute and functional that I would be tempted to see if the barter system could be revived and see if the website has any use for a pug. (Because I wasn't a helicopter pet parent, the only trick Hershey knows is "sit", so clerical work might be out).

3. Nathan Women's Intensity Backpack - I admit that I didn't do my fair share of lugging around the water on our longer runs during marathon training, so I would like to make up for it now with this most awesome backpack. The alabaster runner should take me up on this offer and immediately proceed to the online checkout.

I should be grateful that I have crapper cheaper versions of everything on this wishlist, certainly there are bigger bills to battle first. But I believe the ultimate question this post raises should be: Will I die without getting these items? 

Yes, yes I will.

*Set a block from allowing the husband to read blog. No sense of humor.*

My legs do work!

What I discovered to be the best part of running a marathon is the self induced mandatory week off afterwards that you get to enjoy. No 4 a.m. morning runs in the ass-biting cold, no trips to the gym after a lovely day at the office to work on my "Terminator" biceps, and not having to hear my husband "the alabaster runner" complaining about how his little toes-ies are cold in vibrams. Ah.....it's been a blissful week.

Cut to this morning when I realized that my week of laziness is over and I can't shrug off my physical fitness anymore (although if Jessica Simpson can use a sliding scale of optimal fitness over the years, I should be entitled to more than a week). I was concerned about the run on many levels, the least being that I think I ordered the wrong size shoe in the latest edition of bikila vibrams and my big feet are getting claustrophobic. We needed to run an easy 2-3 "shake off the marathon blues" miles and test our legs.

The alabaster runner said that his knees were bothering him a little, which I completely believe because he was the one holding onto the leash of our insanely athletic boxer, Odie. That dog has run nine miles with us before, then afterwards will turn to us with a look that clearly reads, "That's all beeyotches? Lame." Whoever has the immense pleasure of holding onto his leash usually ends up with some aches and pains from Odie pulling ahead like he sees endless fields of bacon swaying in the wind.

I managed to run in my typical injured gazelle fashion and came away enjoying our first recovery run. As long as I keep my achilles pain at bay during my runs this week, I still plan on winning this Cherry Blossom 10 Miler in D.C. I'm cleared to take the gold on that race as long as some 9,000 other runners fail to set their iphone alarms.

I'll continue my easy runs this week and my exciting life of icing my legs, rolling out my legs, and stretching my legs. And that also means I'm trotting my butt over the L.A. Fitness and silently judging everyone who wears hoop earrings to the gym. Don't start me on a rant about hoop earring gym goers.

And I'm done - thanks for hanging around.

Start slowly, then taper off....

Since this is my first blog, I'll do a quick background check on myself and give you the basics...

This is me....

This is my insanely smart pug (thank you TIME Magaine), Hershey.....

and this is what a zombie looks like running....

This is how the three are related to one another, follow the bouncing ball on this one - I love to run, I'm trying to get Hershey to run more than 1/2 mile, and my pace is slightly faster than that of a zombie. It's not as smooth as a Kevin Bacon connection, but you get the idea. Maybe.

Let me clarify by breaking down the basics about myself in order to have this blogging endeavor make sense.

1. I run a crazy fast 10 m/m, which actually gets even slower as I go over the bajillion hills in my neighborhood. I imagine to those watching me I must resemble something of a perkier zombie trolling about the streets. Basically, I need to incorporate some more speedwork into my runs. I'll pencil that right in.

2. My darling husband Travis is my running partner and because he's so - what's the phrase - alabaster white, he tends to bogart the sunscreen on hotter runs.

3. One of my goals is to run a doggie dash with my lovable pug Hershey, but she doesn't have the dedication of the Olympic althetes that I hoped she would possess. She's actually sleeping right now, clearly the ten hours she slept while I was at work didn't cut the mustard today.

4. My shoe of choice is the Vibram Bikila with shoelaces, that's right, the brand spanking new edition! Woot! Although I love minimalist shoes, I respect anyone's shoe choice - this is a safe place. Let's hug it out.

5. I recently ran my first marathon, the Yuengling Shamrock Marathon on 3/20/2011. I don't want to say it didn't go well, but I will most definitely not be purchasing the outrageously priced race photos of myself HOBBLING to the finish. (Of course there's not one friggin' photo of me running the first 21 miles of the race - that would be crazy, who would want a running photo to commemerate their first marathon?)

6. Whenever I initially type "marathon", I always stick a "g" on it and come up with "marathong". I had to edit this inital post six times to correct that mistake already. You're welcome for the little gem of knowledge.

7. I want to connect with other runners and talk about how Under Armour is ridicously expensive, how I know the weather forecast for the next ten days, and complain about how women's race shirts always fit poorly (that is bull crappity - ).

Have patience with the blog, this is something new for me - and I really don't even like the word blogging. I'd like to think I'm writing on the internet with flare. Please feel free to comment and I'll be back soon.

Outtie.